Team Anything Goes has Potential

"Team Anything Goes" is pretty self-explanatory. Anything Goes and we do mean anything.

We are Hope aka manyafandom, Jeanne aka einfach_mich, Kathy aka mskathy, Kim aka kimpy0464 and Stephie aka 4theluvofmary.

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Potential

Rosmarina

Edward Cullen, journalist for the college paper, has despised jocks since high school. What happens when he’s assigned to interview Emmett McCarty, a decathlon athlete who challenges Edward’s every stereotype? Rate M for language, slash & graphic lemons.

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Let me start by saying I'm not usually a fan of Gaymett, but this one is an exception. I really dig this Emmett, gay or otherwise. Yes he's a jock, but that's not all he is. I love that Rosmarina added depth to Emmett. Whereas most of the time he becomes the cliched Dumb Jock. It's rather refreshing!

This story is about looking beyond preconceived notions to what truly lies underneath. And maybe finding what you didn't even know you where looking for...and it has two hot dudes. What's not to love? Edward is sure of what Emmett is and find himself delightfully surprised, when it turns out he was wrong. He's also dealing with an unexpected attraction to someone that is physically so not his type.

These two build the slow burn of attraction to each other. Playing it cool, while internalizing their attraction to the other. There is overt, coy flirting and dancing around each other. I kinda love it. They don't instantly go at each other and fall into bed or the nearest flat, stable surface. Don't get me wrong, there are smutty fun times! Yay! The flirting becomes more pronounced and the tension ramps up. There's a encounter in a locker room that is all kinds of steamy.

I can't wait to see where she takes these two!


One of the great things about Slash, other than hot boys getting sexy with each other, it's getting to see two characters in a different light. Now, this does not mean Out Of Character. In fact, that is often a bit of an issue with some slash fics, but that's not an issue with Potential. In fact, one of the things that I love about this story is how In Character Emmett and Edward are, despite being human and very gay.

Potential is the story of two very different men who slowly but surely come to respect and eventually (I hope) love each other. Emmett is strong, confident and sweet natured. Edward is focused, idealist and a little arrogant. This story could have easily been a “opposites attract” cliché, but Rosmarina shows how their personalities compliment each other, much as they do in canon.

Here Edward's natural tendency to make assumptions based on his own personal experiences misleads him when he sets out to interview Emmett, a local athlete. Edward is a talented journalist, that normally does a column on the local music scene, and he think he's above interview some jock. During the drive from Seattle to Portland, Emmett careful overturns every assumption that Edward has made about him.

I love these two, and more importantly I love them together. They play a flirty game of cat and mouse, around Emmett's sexuality as Edward's interest in him grows from a professional to something more. He's not the only one who's interested.

This story is detail, well crafted and very realistic. The UST in the first chapter is Un-Fucking-believable! There were times where it had be chewing on my own hand as I read, just waiting for one of them to finally giving into their intense sexual chemistry. When they finally get together, it's hot, fast and well done.

I have openly proclaim that I am NOT a Wusperv, but I must admit there is one genre of fic that never fails to reduce me to a big schmoopy mess, and that's Slash. I love to see them win out against all odds. I cheer when they finally proclaim their love, and I ball like a bitch when they get their HEA.

I'm hoping for a Happy Ending for this Emmett and Edward. They are quickly becoming my new favorite slash ship. I am sure, if you put on your big girl pants, and give Potential a chance, you'll feel the same.


Kathy is away playing with Mickey Mouse and the gang and wasn't able to leave a review. We'll let her slide this one time ;P


Back when I first started to read Fan Fiction, I was simply a canon girl. All this “Alternate Universe” and “All Human” stuff made NO sense to me. Although I’m laughing as I write this, there was once upon a time (it was a very, very short amount of time, mind you), it gave me the shudders to think of slash when it comes to Twilight. That isn’t to say I was anti-slash; on the contrary, I am rather zealous about my slash. I love it, but with a caveat: It must be well written, accurate, and realistic. In my mind, the concepts of “FF” and “good slash” were mutually exclusive.

Well, all that fell quickly to the wayside when I learned about a little story called “All I Ever Knew” by someone known as “Manyafandom.” Yes, kids, our very own Hopey was the one who popped my Twi FF Slash Cherry. MsKathy’s stories were soon to follow. Finally, someone who understood how hot it is to watch two guys make out!!

By and large, much of the FF slash I’ve read has left me feeling somewhat hollow. Mind you, I am not unaware of the fact that it is a challenge to write good male/male slash when you are a straight female. However, many of the gay male relationships in Twi FF seem more like a male/female relationship than male/male. That’s where I get all tripped up. I’m a total hag, and I know how my ghey boys usually roll. It is often about hot men having hot sex, and then getting to know each other later.

Another problem I’ve found to be inherent within Twi FF male slash is that the pairings tend to be Edward/Jasper, or, sometimes, Edward/Carlisle. While I have nothing against reading these kinds of stories (hell, I have many of them in my favorites list), it would be really nice to see something else for a change. Enter a little story called “Potential.”

This is a coupling of Emmett and Edward, so my interest was immediately piqued. Emmett is often written so macho that you couldn’t imagine him being gay. Rosmarina does an admirable job of infusing the stereotypical Emmett qualities into her incarnation of the character, while still making him believably gay. This Emmett is kind, affable, funny, and loveable, and adorably modest about his physical attributes.

The story, which is a continuation of a one-shot, pairs Edward, the reporter, with his assigned subject matter, Emmett, the Decathlete. Edward is not thrilled to have to complete a spread on a stupid jock. He is a bit of an intellectual snob, and thinks the job is beneath him. Naturally, Emmett wins him over during the weekend they are forced to travel together to and from a meet in Oregon.

Edward comes with a little bit of baggage (what gay guy doesn’t?), but he is, as always, a beautiful, lean, intelligent incarnation. He doesn’t fall for guys like Emmett. Except, apparently, that he does now. The manner in which Emmett reveals his sexual orientation to Edward is a very poignant, but matter-of-fact, moment. Edward so doesn’t want to fall for this guy, but he just can’t help himself. They end up having a fuckhot session where they wank each other off and exchange some pretty steamy BJs in the locker room. I was impressed with the way the author describes rimming without actually using the term.

Naturally, once these boys get back to their real lives, things become more complicated. As a journalist, Edward’s choice to get involved with his subject matter flirts with some ethical boundaries. While Emmett is not in the closet per se, he is also not loud and proud, either. His coach, family, and close friends know, but that is about it. They both need to overcome these issues if they want to be together. After a slight amount of UST, Emmett ends up in Edward’s room, where neither one can deny their chemistry nor their lust. I absolutely love the way she describes their interaction with one another—rather than rehashing Stephenie Meyer’s “electricity” when Edward and Bella touch, Rosmarina refers to their connection as “kinetic”:

In those romance novels Rosie read there was always some kind of spark or electricity when the potential lovers eventually kissed. No, when Edward finally pressed his mouth against mine it wasn't electric; it was fucking kinetic. It was a triggered spring that set us both in perpetual motion.

This piece has all the elements of a romantic story: Compelling characters, undeniable chemistry and mutual attraction, and fuckhot man-on-man schmex. While there are only five chapters so far, including the one-shot and a “preview” chapter, I’m really anxious to see where she takes these boys.


Normally when I think of Twilight slash, Edward and Jasper come to mind. So most of the slash I read sticks to that ship. When I discovered Potential was an Edward/Emmett fic, I was somewhat hesitant. It's like Emmett, eternal pussy lover, is just burned in my brain. Rosmarina proved that E/Em is not only believable, but sexy as hell. Edward is a journalist at UDub, assigned to cover one of the school's track stars. Enter Emmett McCarty. He's instantly likable and a little bit mysterious since his sexual orientation can go either way. Like Edward, I found myself having a hard time resisting Emmett's charm.

I loved having the original o/s from Edward's POV because you get a good feel of how conflicted he is. He had a hard break up. His childhood was pretty awful thanks to one Royce King. It seems as though he doesn't really want to give anyone a chance to get close, despite his fortune cookie saying otherwise. When he finally let's down his guard in the locker room...well, let's just say both men were able to take a load off. Ahem.

Emmett's POV is refreshing because he is so honest and down to earth. He also retains that "manly" athletic type of character so commonly associated with him. What is different is his sometimes insecurity with his bulk. I kinda like that. It shows a vulnerabilty that is endearing.

I'm really excited to see how things work out between these two when the article on Emmett is published. Will there be any backlash despite those supportive of both men? How will they cope? And really...when do we get some more down and dirty?


I think this is the first time I have ever read an entirely EmPOV story, and I have to say it is a hell of a cherry popper. This Emmett is the bear of a man that we know and love, but at the same time he is introspective and unsure. He is not afraid to say what he wants and what he is feeling, but we also get to see the person putting themselves out there and fearing rejection. One might think that this would make the writing confused, but Rosmarina writes it in such a way that you believe that he is the confident man he projects, but he too has his Achilles heel. In this case, he just doesn't want to have his emotions toyed with. In that way, it is nice to see a mature Emmett
who is often left as the comedic release. This is a grown man with goals and who knows who he is.

Edward, in this case, seems a little less self assured when the story begins, but as we see that he is just internalizing his battles with his ethics as a writer falling for his subject. He wants to prove that he can be a good journalist, because that IS what he is passionate about, but at the same time, cannot ignore the pull of this surprising man that has been put in his path.

When it comes to the sexy times, I have to admit, the first time I was biting my nails just WAITING for someone to walk in on them. I almost, I repeat almost, couldn't enjoy the moment, because of the anxiety. As for Emmett's rush over to Edward's apartment, I loved it. He had all
he needed to hear in Edward's admission to starting to fall for him, he wasn't going to let a seed of doubt slip in. Instead, we see passion and Edward taking the aggressor role. Finally, your Slash Award nomination for best Hand Job is well earned, as we watch these two stroke and lavish attention upon each other in a way I have neverread and made me wish I had a peen.

This story is a breath of fresh air, and I look forward to reading more!

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Gotta a rec for Team Anything Goes? Send it to me at kathy@pervpackssmutshack.com

The Tide comes in for SweetDulcinea

SweetDulcinea

Tides

16

lambcullen

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I am pretty open-minded when it comes to shipping the Twilight characters in fanfic, especially AH stories. I like reading different pairings when an author writes the characters in a way that makes you forget about canon and enjoy the ride. It’s something I like to play with in my own writing as well. That being said, you still can’t beat a really great Edward/Bella story because, seriously, isn’t that what brought the majority of us to the world of fanfiction in the first place?

That is why I’m grateful for lambcullen. I’ve learned that I can count on her for canon pairings, captivating stories, creative plots, addictive characters, and the reason you’re reading this post: hot hot lemons. There’s no lack of loving in her stories, which I’ll admit made it a tough choice. So sit back and let me tell you why Chapter 16 should come with an HoC warning (that’s Hand on Crotch, darlings).

"Wear a skirt, BB."

I blinked rapidly, wondering why the hell he wanted that.

"Huh? Why?"

He sighed and grabbed my hips, pulling them towards him. His nose nuzzled at my navel, where it peeked under the edge of my tank. My legs almost gave out. The smallest touch set me on fire and had me wanting so much more.

"Can't you just do as I ask? There is a reason, but I can't tell you until later." His tone was clipped.

He meant what he said, and I would upset him if I came downstairs in jeans. I smiled down at him, and nodded, wanting to keep that smile on his face.

A skirt, you say? Well, you know that a man’s mind is in a dirty place when he requests that. It’s a good thing we’re all into that sort of thing! While we could probably predict Edward’s plan, Bella was still quite clueless as she entertained their barbeque guests.

"Follow me," he whispered, squeezing my hand tightly.

I didn't look back at the others, as he tugged me around the side of the house, and out of view.

"What was that all about..?" I tried to ask, but his lips fixed forcefully on mine, stopping all conversation.

He shoved my back against the wooden slats of the house. His mouth met mine aggressively, as his hand gripped my waist tightly. I could taste the hunger on his tongue, and feel the need rolling off him. Edward needed reassurance. Right now he was nothing more than an abandoned, hurt little boy who was seeking solace the only way he knew how. I wanted to weep for him. Aro had been right, he wasn't any more certain of himself than I was. Edward just hid it better.

I fumbled with the hem of his shirt, pushing my hands underneath and laying my palms flat against his abdomen. He nipped harshly at my bottom lip, growling and pushing me harder into the wall. He was being more forceful even than he'd been before, and I knew it was what he needed right now. It was arousing me beyond anything I'd experienced. The more he bit at my mouth, the more I wanted it. The tighter he held me, the tighter I wanted it, and the more he ground against me, the more I ground back.

I whimpered when his lips left mine, to torture my neck.

"Shush," he crooned in his velvet smooth voice. "They'll hear you."

Oh my… Now that I have your attention, let’s pause for a little background information.

Tides is set in La Push, where Bella returns after years away to claim her late grandfather’s home and start a new life for herself. Enter Edward, her childhood friend, who just so happens to be presumptuous, cocky, and frequently naked. Fuck. And. Yes. The house on the beach is an integral part of their history together and their current relationship, and that theme runs throughout the entire story. When the Vanity Fair photos of RPattz came out, I immediately connected them to Tides. They were perfect! High grass, overcast sky, and the scattered stones much like the Pacific Northwest beaches had my mind creating a hundred great possibilities for these characters. Need a reminder?

Do you see where I’m going with this? I’m sure that photo shoot inspired many lemons…and perhaps a few private moments around the fandom. Come on, admit it, ladies.

But I digress. Between the beach house setting, the explosive chemistry Edward and Bella shared, and those photos, I knew what I wanted, and I told Lambie waaaaay back in my Chapter 9 review:

So I was thinking...they need to do it up against the house. How hot would that be? Come back after a walk on the beach...all needy and hot. Yeah... I think it would fit Edward's somewhat dominating/possessive tendencies. Just a thought =)

Who wouldn’t enjoy a nice romp up against the side of the house, listening to the waves crashing on the shore just a few hundred feet away? Yum. Add in the taboo of being just around the corner from your friends and possibly getting caught, and this scene was on fire.

His mouth moved back to my neck, and he latched his teeth against the flesh and sucked hard. I mewled and hitched my leg around his knee. His fingers immediately snaked to my wet needy pussy. Edward parted my folds and delved his fingers inside, groaning when he met my slick heat. He didn't stop sucking on my neck until I whined a little in pain. I knew that was going to mark, but couldn't bring myself to care. His fingers were playing with my pussy, and making my body hum with need for him and him alone.

I lowered my hand to his jeans and unbuckled the belt, before popping each button open. Edward pushed a finger into me, as the last one flew open and my hand touched his hardened cock.

He cursed into my neck, my fingers wrapping around his erection tightly. We began rocking in unison against the house, both consumed in each other.

"Another?" he questioned, but before I could comprehend what he was referring to, he pushed a second finger inside me, stretching me deliciously.

"Oh!" I whimpered.

Our breathing was becoming heavy and fast. I needed more than his fingers to sate me. I needed him filling me, thrusting into me with force.

"Edward," I gasped softly.

"I want you now, BB. I can feel how wet you are for me. So fucking ready for my cock. Tell me you want me."

"Oh yes," I breathed.

He pulled his fingers from me, making me want to cry, but I watched in fascination as he brought his shining fingers to his lips and lapped at them, tasting me. My legs almost gave way. How could something I would have found repulsive only a few months ago be so arousing now?

"Divine," he crooned, before hitching me up and around his body, my back flat against the wood.

Is that it? No, definitely not, but this is one you have to read for yourself. While I can’t say that Lambie wrote this scene because of my review, she and I did have a good laugh together when she told me she was in the process of writing this chapter when I sent her that message. Coincidence…or fate? *evil grin*

So go on, darlings. Browse through those Vanity Fair pics again and get yourself a nice mental picture to work with. Then head over to Tides and apply those images to lambcullen’s delightful story. I promise you won’t be disappointed. I’m pretty sure you’ll never look at those photos the same way again, either! And if you’re the type who doesn’t like to read stories until they’re complete, then you’re in luck – Tides was completed last week. These characters will be missed, but you’d be smart to check out some of her other fics as well!
Thanks for reading, and enjoy your lemonade!

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SweetDulcinea is the author of 19 stories. Including the fabbio Toxic a Peter/Bella story. A lover of Jackson and an all around cool ass chick!

Renfield and Chiclets by katinki

Renfield and Chiclets

katinki

10

52,033

332

Edward Cullen, PhD: brilliant, nerdy, mildly attractive, and obsessed with Blood and Vampires. Oh, and pervertedly horny. Join him as he searches for Ms. Right in a series of inter-related smut, erm I mean, one shots. AH/Severely OOC/Very M

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theladyingrey42

Renfield and Chiclets is one of those rare fics that manages to hit every possible note for me. It has an Edward whose isolation and lonely past kick me in the gut repeatedly, and yet whose lust and kinks practically make me salivate. It features a Bella that is strong and sexually confident to the point of aggressive. It has real emotion churning beneath a plot that at first seems to be all about lust and kink.

And, oh yeah, it is easily the most unabashedly, deliciously pervy thing I have had the pleasure of reading in ages.

The story, which katinki refers to as "a series of related one-shots," revolves around a brilliant if socially isolated Edward. And while that may sound like the biggest cliché in the fandom, katinki takes it to a whole new level. As I read I can actually feel his removal from a world that doesn't make sense to him and which he chooses to refrain from interacting with in any sort of meaningful way. He's the kind of man who knows his strengths and his weaknesses, and has long since moved past the fact that he is socially inept. His knowledge of his own ineptness is so ingrained that he mentions it almost casually, in passing, as if it is a given that he will be unsuccessful in any social interaction he might undertake. After giving an even-handed listing of his finer qualities, he goes on to dismiss all of them with the simple statement that, "none of this helped get him laid because the moment he opened his mouth, the probability of sexual success plummeted. For some reason, women did not seem to appreciate his lectures on biochemistry."

When we meet him, Edward is the star employee of a biomedical pharmaceutical company, performing delicate experiments on blood-born pathogens. Rather than a simpering assistant or co-ed, Bella is his ball-busting boss who sashays into work in outfits that send him out of his mind with lust. His descriptions of his afternoon, um, self-indulgences make me giggle and pine right along with him.

As if Edward isn't adorable enough with his self-deprecation and isolation and self-love, he is also a gigantic perv, which is where this story really starts to step into a class of its own. Although he tries to hide it, it is well-known around the office that Edward is completely obsessed with vampires. He follows all of the major fictional vampires and has a "massive stash of vampire erotica" that he uses to fuel his many fantasies, and even some of his past sexual escapades.

When Edward and Bella finally come together, these vampire-fueled fantasies feature prominently. As Edward begins to realize that Bella is just as kinky as he is, an elicit nature enters into their coupling, leading to charged encounters and fuck-hot lemons that just manage to press all the right buttons for me. Usually, I'm pretty easily squicked out by bloodplay, but somehow or other katinki manages to make it hot hot hot in this story and I was finding myself ogling my husband's pulse point by the end of this one.

At the time that I am writing this, there are ten chapters, each of which includes one hell of a lemon, and yet so far katinki still manages to keep the smut sexy and pervy and fresh. We see everything from light bondage to the aforementioned inexplicably delicious bloodplay to just plain old possessive claiming and fucking.

Tying together all the lemons is a growing relationship that is all about shared physicality and lust at first but which evolves into a level of connection and trust and possession between the two of them. Edward's continuing insecurity regarding the hold he has over her is a source of constant sighs and 'aw's on my part, and her reassurances just fuel them to even pervier, lustier heights.

And as if that weren't enough, there's a snide and sarcastic humor to it, especially in some of the more farcical situations they find themselves in and in Edward's hyper-intelligent, self-deprecating narration.

Suffice it to say that I have been enjoying this fic immensely. It's sexy and fun and yet has something a little deeper to it as well, with incredibly memorable scenes and characters. I'm always delighted to see it in my box, and yet the loose "series of one-shots" plot keeps me from freaking out when there's a bit of a lag between updates.

On the whole, I give it 4.5 out of 5 kinky band-aids.

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I really really like this story. Initially I really wasn't sure if I would or not. I do think that early chapters do read like unrelated, unconnected sexy encounters. BUT - they are still bloody hot. This is a fun story - do not expect lots of life altering realisations and for you as the reader to go on your own journey of self-improvement and discovery. What Renfield & Chiclets will give you instead - is a pacey, sexy story with 2 protagonists who are on the outskirts of society who are giving one another a jolly good time.

They are going on their own journey - exploring their kinks, their passion and their growing dependency on one another. It is obvious that these two can offer each other a lot! A lot that the rest of society cannot. Plenty sexual. But also plenty of acceptance, they get one another, whether it be Edward's social hesitance or Bella's professional ball-breaking - they love one another kinks, anxieties, persuasions, and vulnerabilities.

There is LOTS of sex in this story. To me its a sexy story. Edward is not ashamed of the things that turn him on. But he is surprised that his sharp seductress of a boss shares his love for blood play, biting, rough sex, role-play and toys. He revels in it. It allows him to fully embrace that side of him that he hid and believed he could never fully indulge.

I also love how Edward views Bella. He respects and gets off on her work place superiority, dominance, power and aggression. He worships her clever mind, her quick wits and her appreciation and understanding of science. Additionally he worships her body. His narrative of her body makes us the reader picture her as ripe and luscious. A juicy peach, with velvety skin, just ripe for the plucking, biting and fucking. In my eyes that makes for a delicious read. You feel how much he adores and respects her - whilst still viewing her as the ultimate sexual creature. Bella empowers him to shake off his social withdrawal and shyness, and instead take charge. But they switch things up a fair bit too. This relationship is not just on his terms. Bella is demanding in her search for the decadent release that only KinkWard can delight her with.

4 Neon Band-Aid covered love bites out of 5 from me.


Not gonna lie, when this first came into the Naughty Librarian I was all "What The Fuck is this Shit?". But I read and realized it's actually kinda brilliant. Yeah, I said Brilliant, deal. Like my cohorts I agree this is not just "a series of related one-shots," it's a love story with a kinky side.

Katinki unabashedly goes there with this story. I think that's what I love the most. Edward and Bella both have darker proclivities and are not embarrassed by them (well, maybe a little in public). There isn't some trauma in their pasts, they aren't victims, and they don't have some deep seeded neurosis. They're just fucking kinky, plain and simple.

They are evenly matched in the kink department too. This isn't one person having aberrant leanings and taking the other with them. They are equally in this together. Not to mislead, it's not like there are whips and chains and cuffs and goblets of blood. There isn't heavy or even mild BDSM or massive bloodplay. They just like it a little bit rougher than the average couple and to have a little lick or suck from a love bite.

The other thing I really like, is that even though these two got at like fucking rabbits (Yay!) there is still a sense of UST, of longing and need between them. It's not just physical, it's not just because the other accepts and embraces their kink (Yay, for that btw), it's deeper than that. There's understanding outside of the proclivities, there's dare I say it love. And given what they do with each other, a pure love.

Also it's funny, no really it is. They are both science geeks, too intelligent for their own good, and not really good with the social interacting. It's Geeks with Kinks! What's not to love about that?

This Bella is strong and confident without coming off as a bitch. But she's also warm and caring and above all understanding and not judgmental. She's kinda perfect. She's also a tease of the highest order. Edward believes she dresses the way she does, professional yet sexy, just to drive him nuts. I kinda believe she does too, hehe.

Okay, I know some of you are gonna get all up in arms of Edward's use of the word "Slut" in reference to Bella. But here's the thing, he doesn't mean it, not really. He has Bella so high up on the perfection pedestal that she's gotta nose bleed from the altitude. Everyman wants a slut in the bedroom, it's a base fantasy of the gender. To me, him using slut is part of their "role play" if you will. She's eager and willing and wants it just as much as he does. She likes it when he calls her that, it's all part of the kink for them.

I'm not gonna get into all the things they get into. What's the fun in that, read it for yourself. But I will share my fav lemon in the story so far. It takes place in the back seat of Edward's Volvo at a rest stop of all places. I know you're thinking, hello skeevy much? Trust me, it's not. It's intimate and loving and shows that it's not just fucking between these two. It's almost sweet, in a sweaty, intense, mind-blowing way.

Le sigh, I love this duo and can't wait to see where Katinki takes them next. Where ever it is, it will be lemony, loving, and all around awesome.

5 out of 5 Neon Band-Aid covered Love Bites and a couple of extra hard thrusts for good measure.


Lets hear it for good old fashion fun! Sometimes you just need a good hard fuck. R&C provides that quite nicely.

This story is different, and it took me a little bit to get into it, but once Edward and Bella had their first encounter (and what an encounter it was), I was sold. One thing that this story accomplishes is allowing it’s protagonists to be comfortable with their sexuality.

Bella is salacious, wanton and sexually charged. I wanted to lick her as soon as Edward described her. While this Edward is shy, reserved on the outside, internally he is a smoldering volcano of sexual power. When these two refreshingly sexually liberal characters get their freak on, my iPhone nearly melted from the fucking hotness.

Warning to the more vanilla reader, this fic does feature some blood play. However, it is approached in a gentle and very realistic manner. I may or may not have some experience in this type of sexual deviance (*tries to look coy*) and I can tell you that it was really nice to see it dealt with so skillfully. It is also so hot, that I may still be rereading certain passages. *bites lip till it bleeds*

If you are looking for some deliciously naughty, humorous and skillfully written smut, than this is the story for you. Make sure you're alone (or with someone who can help with visual demonstrations), get comfortable and enjoy a good hard fuck!

3 out of 5 band-aid covered lovebites


I must first confess: I don't have a real issue with bloodplay. If you do, I would still encourage you to read, as this does NOT dive heavily into fetish bloodplay. Yes, Edward has a kink (most of us do,I think), but it's not a true fetish -- he can, and often does, fuck Bella without the presence of blood. At least, the explicit presence.

We learn so much about Edward in the very first chapter: he likes blood, he wanks a lot, he watches porn, and he's very, very smart. Like most supremely smart people, he's entirely socially inept, by his own admission.

This is a confident, assured Bella. She's been dropping hints at poor Edward for some time, but he's too in his own head to pick up on them. Finally, frustrated, she lays it all on the line at the company Halloween party:

"I want you to fuck me… Lestat," she said with another wink.

More fucking hot, dirty lemons in chapter 2, and I realized that we have no clue about Edward's sexual past. I mean, we can probably safely assume it was limited, because of his social awkwardness, but was he a virgin?! Ah ha, the answer comes (no pun intended) in chapter four.

I love Edward repeating Bella's words in chapter 7, and that's what makes this story really enjoyable for me -- two people, indulging their kinks, in love, and happy together. Yes mother fucking please, and thank you.

My favorite lemon is in chapter 7. Yum, yum, yum.

"Again, Bella. I'm not…stopping…until you come… again," he breathed.

UNG. YES. Thank you. Please.

Ahem. Right, so.

The ending of chapter 8 nearly killed me with a giggle fit. The balance of smut versus giggles is delightful, and I honestly laugh and UNG almost every chapter.

You KNOW you're in for a good time when the chapter begins with, “This chap is a fuckload of smut.” *dreamy sigh* Gee, really? I really “have” to read this as my blog homework? Aw, shucks! The things we do for you...

Wait, wait, wait. My new favorite lemon is in chapter 9. Yes, definitely chapter 9. Well, maybe I need to re-read them. A few times. Then compare. This could take awhile.

Chapter 10 is the Haiti Collab piece/outtake, a delicious look into some time earlier between Bella and Edward.

I love Renfield & Chiclets, not just because of the hot lemons – although that's reason enough to love it – but because even though the author dismisses it as a series of porny connected stories, there *is* more here. Overshare moment, but as someone married to someone kinky, who identifies as kinky as well, SO MUCH of this story resonated with me. I want to find katinki and kiss her. Maybe with a little teeth.

5 out of 5 neon band-aid covered love bites. And a bonus hair pull!


When I hear words like "research," "data," and "peer-reviewed journals," I tend to get all wonky, hot, and bothered. When a story actually uses footnotes for references? Cue the drool. Add a pair of glasses, lab jackets, cell cultures, and my nerdvana is complete. Suffice it to say I really, really liked this scientific Nerdward. UNF x infinity.

But wait, there's more! This Nerdward is also a genius, social nonconformist, eternally horny, has an online porn habit, and a smidge of fetishism. GAH! On top of it all, he lusts after his boss, Dr. Bella Swan, who is one hot, sexually confident mama. My geeky brain almost went into overload with all the scientifically-charged schmexiness.

For the most part, I loved the pairing of this Edward and Bella, because they both saw eye-to-eye in terms of their fetishism and sexual appetites. I loved their sexual chemistry. I loved the fact that Edward wasn't necessarily confident in his ways with women, but somehow, went he paired up with Bella, he was able to become more dominant and commanding. Oh, my, did he ever become dominant, TYVM.

Bella, for her part, tortures Edward daily by wearing the most provocative outfits around. She is brilliant in her own right, able to meet Edward on his level intellectually. She has pierced nipples, which Edward can see through her shirt, and whenever he notices them, he combusts. Before they actually hook up, her attire is the subject of frequent office wanks for Edward, which were win all by themselves.

When they finally, actually have sex, it is hot and explosive. They don't do anything halfway. *fans self* It is hot, rough, feral, and mutually satisfying. Once Edward actually gets it into his head that Dr. Swan not only likes him but wants to sex it up with him constantly, the fun really begins. Their sexual chemistry is magic, almost like they always know what the other partner needs at any given time. Bella starts to use sex to help Edward calm down and relax, and it becomes a drug to him. She manages to show up at just the right moment. As a reader, it was so satisfying to read about a sexual relationship that is truly symbiotic. They are both exactly what the other one needs.

I'm really looking forward to seeing what scientific references Katinki will use next; my favorite part of the story is the footnotes. HA! While I loved the footnotes, I can't wait to see how Bella and Edward continue to get their freak on together. Steamy, smoldering goodness, through and through.

4 out of 5 neon-colored band-aid covered lovebites.


Let's be honest, the summary itself could very easily portray this as a crackfic or at least a comedy but it's not. As tLiG said, the author portrays this as "a series of related one-shots" and that's one of the things I adore about the story. Each chapter can stand alone but together, unf.

It's sexy, steamy and smutty in every way possible and it works perfectly well with the storyline, and yes... there is one.

When they meet, Edward dressed as a very famous lit vampire is enough to make your head explode. Add in the fact that he is obsessed with the lore and the lifestyle surrounding vamps and you've got a frighteningly attractive man. You wouldn't think so right? I mean, I don't dig the goth vibe at all but on him, it works... a lot. To add to his attractiveness - at least to me - is that he's a total perv and completely unapologetic about it. I fucking love that. Embrace the perv, don't hide it.

Bella is his superior and that right there makes me love her to death. On top (snicker) of her being the HBIC, she's sexually agressive and confident and her take no shit attitude just fuels him on even more. The two with their crazy explosive sexual appetites makes this for a great read.

It's not just the smut though, they're perfect for the other. How hard is it to be such total non-conformists and still manage to find your soul-mate. Excellent.

4 out of 5 Neon Band-Aid covered Lovebites from me.


We've all read the Nerd/Geek/Awk-ward before, but probably not anything like this. This Edward is a freak. And I mean that in the best sense of the word. While socially inept with his peers, he is this raging ball of horny just dying to come (hehe) out and play. I'm talking, run to the bathroom rub one out before he creams his pants kind of horny.

Bella, his superior and sexy as hell fantasy, is just as freaky. Just as much of a raging ball of horny. Edward just doesn't know it at first.

Their first encounter happens during a Halloween party thrown by fellow employee Emmett. Three words: Edward as Lestat. The fun starts there and only gets hotter. I've never really even began to consider how I'd view bloodplay, especially when it was in a non vampire fic. I suppose an excessive amount would probably squick me out. However, I found it really hot. Cleary, if that is not your thing...you probably don't want to read it. But maybe give it a chance. It's nothing excessive.

What seems like just a series of smut shots, turns into a story about sexual discovery. An exploration of all things kinky and hot and rawr. Bella and Edward also delve into deeper feelings than just sex, something that always makes me happy. Through it all, katinki is able to make me laugh, swoon, and sweat. All good things in my book.

3.5 out of 5 band aid covered love bites.


This story had me at science nerdWARD with glasses. The whole rest of the story could have been just him cooped up in his office spewing details of his scientific trials, and I would have been a happy girl. This Edward, like most who are portrayed as scientists, is socially awkward. Scratch that. He is socially reluctant. He not only feels uncomfortable in social situations, he loaths them, mostly because he feels he can't relate to anyone. His personality, so far, leaves me teetering between wanting to hold his hand (which he would immediately wash all traces of with Purell) and pulling the stick out of his ass. This is Edward left to his own devises.

Enter sexy boss lady, Bella. I love a self-assured, sexually aggressive Bella. She is not only that, but she is smart as hell. We discover by the end of chapter 1 that boss lady not only wants to have our boy seven ways to Sunday, but she shares his fascination with vampirism in the boudoir.

The sexual relationship in this story is lascivious. Once they get a taste, sexually and literally, they can't get enough. They are not discerning where things go down (snicker), their first being on a colleague's desk at his home during a Halloween party. Homes, offices, cars, and alley ways are christened along the way. The sex is heated and aggressive and leaves this h00r panting.

Through all the passion, these two like souls find they are in love. I am looking forward to watching this couple navigate their new relationship and their lives.

3 out of 5 Band-Aid covered LoveBites